Glue

You know those big boiling pots of molten stuff that sit atop the castle gates? When their ropes are cut, they tip sideways, spilling out over their enemies below.

I have one of those inside me. It gets hauled in, uninvited, and placed at the top of my brain. It's not filled with anything hot, however. It feels rather more like glue. And what lies below is reason, love, spirit, joy, emotion, kindness, decency, and essentially, me.

I can tell when the big pot is put in position. And once I can feel it there, I can rarely get it to leave. It's just a matter of time until it spills over.

It seeps down and fills my head first, then my arms and legs, until I become slow and powerless.

It can take some time to get the glue all out. 

I'm told that by involving others, it can become easier to keep the glue out. But what a mess! Who am I to ask others to get dirty helping me? And besides, it seems that no one I know has much experience with de-gluing.

When I feel glue-free, I try to be aware and to help others who feel stuck, in whatever way they may be. I want to. I enjoy helping other people.

But when I feel bogged down, that's when the room clears, and other wait awkwardly away from me until I become me again.

It's not going to be this way forever. I don't know how else to ask. Yes, through a blog post is immature and not likely to be effective, but-

I'm filled with glue right now so I just don't care that much.