Homecoming Talk

Sign placed at the intersection of 400E and 1600N Orem, UT

This the talk I gave at my homecoming address on March 20, 2011. I got home from my mission to Montana on March 17, and my brother Jesse got married two days later. There wasn't much time to think or compose. I just prayed that I would be able to say what I needed to.

My brother-in-law recorded me from his iPhone as he sat in the audience. I've transcribed my talk based on that recording, which began a few minutes in, and which was interrupted by a phone call; the recording is incomplete, but you should be able to get the gist of it. Small edits have been made to make this article a little more formal. Below is the mp3 version of the talk, which was taken in three sections. The sections overlap a bit, so don't worry when I repeat myself for a few seconds...I'm not smart enough to make them all run together smoothly. Turn up your speakers. It's a little soft.

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I began in a usual manner, greetings, good to be back, wonderful to see you all again, etc. Then I began talking about the online proselyting program I was a part of as a missionary, this blog being a result of that effort.

Describing our focus as online missionaries, the recording begins:

(The picture here is a remake of the new mormon.org cards designed to spread the gospel online. These are missionaries in Billings, Montana who have joined in the online effort.)
Ok, here we go---

"We reach out to everyone we can. I focused mainly on less-active members and recent converts that I had met during my mission. We had a zone conference recently where my mission president said (well he expressed his feelings about this new assignment... he's very nervous [appropriately so, I thought; perhaps not]. It's a very scary thing to allow one hundred twenty nineteen-to-twenty-year-olds online every day while they're on their missions. But I know that Heavenly Father is directing that; and he expressed those feelings as well.) And he shared a quote by Spencer W. Kimball, and I wish I had printed that off; I didn't have time. (Find it here.)

President Kimball prophesied that the church would continue to move forward and gospel would spread, and he was so excited in this quote, in this talk that he gave, about how they could use the two-way radio to reach out to people across the world. You know, we laugh at that now; it's kind of a silly thing. But he talked about how hundreds and thousands of people could be reached all over across the globe, everywhere, and he said that thousands of young missionaries would help with that work. What an incredible thing to be part of that prophecy fulfilled. We were asked to get online every day to spread the gospel that way. It's an incredibly powerful thing to experience that.

Well I want to share a story. This is the story about why I went on a mission. And it's the most important story in my life right now, and I imagine that it will be for the rest of my life and the rest of eternity. And the family I'm going to be describing right now is sitting in the audience today. And so my thoughts and my feelings will be directed to them and to all of you.

Elder Roerdanz and I

I was called to serve in Townsend, Montana. It is a podunk town of two thousand people. I served there for seven and a half months with little over two thousand people to work with (I realize now that there are two thousand on the main city grid, but seven thousand in our total area we covered. Oops. But still.) It was a very unique experience. Not a lot of street contacting, not a lot of people walking around. It was a very different dynamic. And I remember when we got there, we had been doubled in, (that means that me and my companion both were new to the area). And it was the first time that I went senior companion, and I was really nervous. I wanted to start new and do the best I could. And we received a list of names to go try, just to get us started. And I remember on the very very bottom, literally on the very bottom of that list was the Heffelfinger family. And I thought, "What a weird name. What a silly  name. Heffelfinger," you know. And they didn't have an address, but they did have a phone number, and we called that phone number so many times, and it never worked. They have one of those internet phone connections so if the internet was on, it would work. Somehow we always called when the internet was off, and we just never got a hold of them. But as we talked to some of the ward members that knew them, I learned that Sister Heffelfinger worked in the Capitol Building in Helena, Montana, thirty minutes north of Townsend.

I realized at one point that the only way we were going to get a hold of her was at work, and that was kind of a scary thought, you know. Track someone down in the State Capitol. That's not something you want to go do.

But as Elder Roerdanz, my companion, and I were heading home from district meeting on Tuesday, I had the most powerful feeling that I needed to turn around. And we were on a one-way street, so that was kinda difficult. But the Spirit said, "Turn around. Go back to the Capitol Building and find Sister Heffelfinger, right now." It was a scary thought. "I don't want to go to the capitol building; I really don't. This is going to be awkward. I don't even know who she is; what if she's not interested, and I'm stalking her in her workplace," all those thoughts. And the Spirit just said, "Go, and find her, in the Capitol Building."

And so, we turned around, not on the one-way street. We got off, and got on the other one-way, and went to the Montana State Capitol, and walked in.

Montana State Capitol Building, Helena, MT

Senators and congressman were walking everywhere; it was a busy day. Everyone was looking at us so weird, because we were missionaries, in the Capitol Building, with our tags on. We went to the wrong side, asking for Sheri Heffelfinger, and they referred us to the other side of the building. We walked over there, and we waited for a little while outside. Someone guided us over to her room, and as we walked in, I knew. As soon as I walked into the room I knew that I needed to be there. And she looked up from her desk, and she introduced herself. She said that she would love to have us over. She wanted to have us over right away.

I could not have known in that moment the trials that they were going through and the prayers she was offering. "Please guide me. I don't know where to go, I don't know what to do. I want to go to church, but how can I trust in organized religion, what am I supposed to do?" I didn't know she was praying to know what to do, but I found her. We found her.

And the rest is history.

The most incredible lessons I ever had on my mission were in their home. I could never prepare for those lessons. I tried, every time. "What are we going to teach, what are we going to do," and the Spirit just said, "Go. Just go over and I'll tell you what to do."

Every time. Literally, we did not prepare any lessons for them. But when we sat down the Spirit filled the room and we knew exactly what to say. It was incredible.

A few months later, Leah, the youngest daughter, was baptized. I had the privilege of baptizing her, and her conversion story was incredible. I don't have time to relate all the details, unfortunately. Shortly after I left, Erin, the oldest daughter was baptized. Sheri, the mother, who had not been active in the church since she was eight, because of family circumstances, had an incredible conversion and came back to the church. Her husband, Art, as well had not been active since shortly after he was baptized. That whole family was converted. It was an incredible experience for me to see the power of the Atonement of Jesus Christ filling that family and changing them. I saw an incredible change, in just a few months, in each one of their lives, an entirely different demeanor coming over them and a trust in God that had not been there before. That is the reason I went and served on my mission, was to see that change, in others. I had the privilege of participating in that change with many.

What an incredible blessing. You can't measure that.

You know, a mission, when you're a sixteen-year-old, sounds like a lot of rules, and sounds like a lot of time and lot of money, and a lot of effort. And, eh, it is. 
But...

It is the most incredible investment you could ever make. It is the most incredible blessing you could ever receive...to that point in your life. I know there are many more waiting.

Well, I wanted to transition (and I know this is an abrupt transition), and maybe talk about what I was actually assigned.

We were asked to speak on a talk by M. Russell Ballard which, unfortunately, I can't find (I thumbed through the ensign for it, unsuccessfully). Maybe I'll just go from memory on that one. I'm grateful that Diego spoke about the dangers of addiction.

Here is a recently-produced video clip featuring this talk (not a part of the address I gave):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ry8-YIwnEcU

I want to speak now about the power of the Atonement of Jesus Christ to overcome any obstacle and any trial we may face in this life.

I'd like to begin by testifying that Jesus Christ is the Son of God.

And I know that He suffered for each one of us.

And I know that He loves us.

And He did not suffer, and go through all those things, so that when we slip and fall, He can watch us and turn His back.

But He suffered so that every time we fall, the millionth time we fall, that He can reach out His hand and pick us up, and we can keep going forward.

There is a scripture quoted in M. Russell Ballard's talk. It's one of the most common scriptures quoted on the mission, 2 Nephi 2:27. Men are free to choose. That's 27 right? Men are free to choose eternal life, (and) joy, through the great mediator of all men, or captivity and death. We are free to choose.

And I used to think of that scripture as a really definite thing, like you choose once. I'm choosing to do what's wrong, and so I'm going to face the consequences, and that's it, I'm done, I've made that choice so tough luck. Or I've chosen to do what's right, and that's great, and now I'm moving this direction...But that freedom to choose is available to us every moment of every day.

Sometimes the consequences of our choices captivate us for a time; sometimes a long time. But I testify that  the Atonement of Jesus Christ can free us in the eternities. If we choose now to turn our hearts to Jesus Christ, and to give Him everything that we have; to put our whole soul on the alter before Him, that He can make us whole, and He can cleanse us from any addiction that we may have.

I love the scripture in Omni. It has become one of my favorites:

"And now, my beloved brethren, I would that ye should come unto Christ, who is the Holy One of Israel, and partake of his salvation, and the power of his redemption. Yea, come unto him, and offer your whole souls as an offering unto him, and continue in fasting and praying, and endure to the end; and as the Lord liveth ye will be saved."

And it can be difficult. It can be difficult to just take your whole soul and put it on the alter all at once. It's a lifelong process. It's something that we pray for and we strive for every day with everything that we have. And I know that as we continue to try, and to get up, and to move forward, that He can heal us.

I wanted to share a poem with you. You may have heard it. It's a little sentimental, but I hope that you can feel of the Spirit of it:

--

The Race

D.H. Groberg

"Quit, give up, you're beaten"

They shout at you and plead

"There's just too much against you

This time you can't succeed".

And as I start to hang my head

In front of failure's face

My downward fall is broken by

The memory of a race

And hope refills my weakened will

As I recall that scene

Or just the thought of that short race

Rejuvenates my being

Childrens' race, young boys

Young men, how I remember well

Excitement sure, but also fear

It wasn't hard to tell

They all lined up so full of hope

Each thought to win that race

Or tie for first, or if not that

At least take second place

The fathers watched from off the side

Each cheering for his son

And each boy hoped to show his dad

That he could be the one

The whistle blew and off they went

Young hearts and hopes afire

To win and be the hero there

Was each young boy's desire

And one boy in particular

Whose dad was in the crowd

Was running near the lead and thought

"My dad will be so proud"

But as they speeded down the field

Across a shallow dip

The little boy who thought to win

Lost his step and slipped

Trying hard to catch himself

With hands flew out to brace

And amid the laughter of the crowd

He fell flat on his face

But as he fell his dad stood up

And showed his anxious face

Which to the boy so clearly said,

"Get up and win the race"

He quickly rose, no damage done

Behind a bit that's all

And ran with all his might and mind

To make up for the fall

So anxious to restore himself

To catch up and to win

His mind went faster than his legs

He slipped and fell again

He wised then that he had quit before

With only one disgrace

"I'm hopeless as a runner now

I shouldn't try to race"

But in the laughing crowd he searched

And found his fathers face

That steady look which said again

"Get up and win the race"

So up he jumped to try again

Ten yards behind the last

If I'm going to gain those yards he thought

I've got to move real fast

Exerting everything he had

He regained eight or ten

But trying hard to catch the lead

He slipped and fell again

Defeat, he lay there silently

A tear dropped from his eye

There's no sense running anymore

Three strikes, I'm out, why try?

The will to rise had disappeared

All hope had fled away

So far behind, so error prone

A loser all the way

"I've lost, so what", he thought       

I'll live with my disgrace

But then he thought about his dad

Whom soon he'd have to face

"Get up" the echo sounded low

"Get up" and take your place

You were not meant for failure here

"Get up", and win the race

With borrowed will "Get up" it said

"You haven't lost at all"

For winning is no more than this

To rise each time you fall

So up he rose to run once more

And with a new commit

He resolved, that win or lose

At least he shouldn't quit

So far behind the others now

The most he'd ever been

Still he'd give it all he had

And run as though to win

Three times he'd fallen, stumbling

Three times he'd rose again

Too far behind to hope to win

He still ran to the end

They cheered the winning runner

As he crossed the line first place

Head high and proud and happy

No falling, no disgrace  

                                    

But when the fallen youngster

Crossed the line, last place

The crowd gave him the greater cheer

For finishing the race

And even though he came in last

With head bent low, unproud

You would have thought he'd won the race

To listen to the crowd

And to his dad he sadly said

"I didn't do too well"

"To me you won", his father said

"You rose each time you fell"

--

There is more joy and rejoicing in the heavens over one sinner who repents, then over the millions who don't.  (We all do, of course.) Luke 15.

It's most important for us get up and continue to move. And I know in this story, the boy falls three times. I hope there are none of you who say, “Well, that's great, he fell three; but I've fallen thousands, and I can't get up anymore.”

Get up.

You can do it.

I testify that with the Atonement of Jesus Christ, you can be healed. 
We can all be healed, and made clean and whole.

Lawrence E. Corbrige gave one of the most incredible talks. It is an anthem talk for me. I wanted to--I hate to read again; I want to look up and see your faces-- but I feel like I should read this, and then conclude with my testimony.

“Don’t think you can’t. We might think we can’t really follow Him because the standard of His life is so astonishingly high as to seem unreachable. We might think it is too hard, too high, too much, beyond our capacity, at least for now. Don’t ever believe that. ...While the Lord’s invitation to follow Him is the highest of all, it is also achievable by everyone... In this singular instance life’s experience misleads us. In life we learn that the highest achievements in any human endeavor are always the most difficult and, therefore, achievable only by a select few who are most able. The higher the standard, the fewer can reach it.

But that is not the case here because, unlike every other experience in this life, this is not a human endeavor. It is, rather, the work of God. It is God’s work and it is His “glory … to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man.” There is nothing else like it. Not anywhere. Not ever. Therefore, while the Lord’s invitation to follow Him is the highest of all, it is also achievable by everyone, not because we are able, but because He is, and because He can make us able too.”

He says,

“Get on the path and never, ever give up. You never give up. You just keep on going. You don’t quit, and you will make it.”

And I testify that every one of us can make it. And it's not because we're able. And we we all know what our weaknesses are, and we all know that we fall short in a million ways.

But Jesus Christ is perfect.

Jesus Christ suffered for us.

And because of that, if will offer our souls to Him,

if we will be obedient to Him,

if we will follow Him,

then we can be made clean.

Brothers and sisters, I am so grateful for the Lord Jesus Christ. I'm so grateful for what He did for each one of us.

I have one last experience. I know that we are almost out of time.

We had a mission conference, a zone conference, outside, in casual clothes. You won't find that very often in the mission experience. But because we were in Montana, we felt it necessary to meet outside, in nature. It's so incredible there. It's basically like being in temple out there, just out in the middle of nowhere. And so we met together in a zone conference at the Faust Ranch in Missoula, Montana. And our mission president shared the story of the Brother of Jared; and you all know the story, where they were ready to cross the deep, and the Brother of Jared was trying to find a way to get across, trying to find light. Wondering if they should build windows, or what they should do...build a hole. And the Lord asked him, "What do you want me to do?" And the Brother of Jared gathered sixteen small stones and brought them before the Lord. I have one here (I held up a small, transparent stone, about an inch in diameter and not very thick). This is not the original stone. He brought these sixteen stones before the Lord. And he asked the Lord to touch those stones with His finger to make them glow. 

And then our mission president looked up, and with great emotion and in the presence of the Spirit he said, "What do you think would happen...if the Lord touched your heart with His finger?

What do you think would happen if He touched our minds,

if He could touch our souls? What kind of change do you think could take place?"

And so, we keep these stones in our pocket as a reminder of the power of the Atonement to change lives. To change our lives. To change the lives of those we teach.

I know I've been saying it over and over in this talk; I hope it's not repetitive; but there is no limit to the change that can take place. It's hard to believe that when we're beaten and we're down.

So believe me. There is no limit to change that can take place in our lives if we will just choose to get up and move forward. There is always a forgiveness there. There is always peace there. But it takes effort and it takes work, and you have run that race. You have to get up and move and work, and rely on the Atonement, and I testify that someday we will all make it there. 

So I hope in the next few days I can talk with all of you and catch up on my mission and on what's gone on in all of your lives. I love all of you, I've missed you a lot, everyone in this ward. And I know I'm bad at writing, but I've thought about you all the time. 

Thinking about the selfless service that you've given over countless years...that's not an appropriate phrase, I'm sorry...countless years...um, over the years, that change that came into me as a young man was highly attributable to the service that was given by the members of this ward in their callings, and the little things that they did that they didn't think were making any difference. You know, it really made a huge difference in my life. I've been able to serve a mission, and have my life changed forever, and have helped change others' lives as well, all because of Sunday school lessons that you didn't think the kids were going to listen to, you know? I know that those things are important, and they make a difference, and I thank you for that.

I want to conclude with my testimony of the restoration of the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

I testify that the fullness of the Gospel is on the earth today. 

Joseph Smith was a prophet of God, and he saw Jesus Christ and Heavenly Father. He restored the church and the priesthood through the power of God.

The Book of Mormon is absolutely true.

It is a true record of God.

I love the thought that truth cuts its own way. As a missionary, we defend the truth; as members, we defend the truth, but truth cuts its own way, regardless of who believes in it or who doesn't, who's indifferent or who isn't. The truth is the truth.

Now, we can't often state it like that to those who don't know yet. We have to love them, and meet them at their level and help them to realize that. 

But I testify that the things that we know are true.

And I say that in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.